Life's just a Show and we're all the Actors

I am a sufferer of cronic lateness syndrome. Crap. I can't be early!!! I'm always late for everything. I need to find medication for this diesease. Before i'm late for something too importaint to miss.

I feel sad. Not the"sad" as in something sad happened. I mean i just want to give up on everything. I'm just sad. Sad about life. Sad about the world. Sad about my friends. Sad about my family. Sad about my life. Sad. I mean, look at me. Just looking at myself makes me feel sad. Notice i don't use the word depressed. AHHHH!!!! I just gotta find something to be happy about.

I feel so frustrated with my friends. Sometimes i wonder if i even have real friends at all. And am i really that shallow? What you see is what you get? I may be easy to please and be a very happy person but do they forget that i'm a person too? Back when we were younger, i remember them listening to my problems and i listening to theirs. Then we would all stand strong and support one another. But now? I can't even remember when was the last time someone came up to me and asked me if i was ok. I can't remember when was the last time i could really truely trust and confide in someone. When? All i do now is just listen to people's problems and comfort them. THey do not remember that i have feelings too. That i cry too. That i need to be loved and cared for. That i need to be heard. No one remembers...They just think of themselves. People think that i'm selfish and think only of myself. Think back, when was the last time i tought of myself truely. When ever it comes to something really important, i always think of others first. I just am really tired of being left behind. And do they really know, how it really feels? To be left outside alone, when it's cold out there? Can anyone really relate to my problems when they don't even take the time to listen. I've wrapped myself up tightly in a blanket of lies. Hiding behind false truth. Lying to cover up my insecurities. Acting big but actually feeling very small. No one really cares do they? The world is just so tough but i guess that its tougher on me.

Today was REALLY boring. From the minute we arrived in school till recess, i was in the computer lab staring into ther blank screen of the crappy computers in my school. I was so sleepy but i didn't go to sleep. From 7.50 to 10.50 we were in the computer lab. During resess, i went over to the next door class where i plugged in my mp3 player. Khalis was like acting all gay and stuff to the different songs. He was trying to seduce the boys in his class. It was really funny and that cheered me up a bit. After recess, we went back to the computer lab. The teachers really have nothing better to do i guess. Anyway, after coming back from the computer lab an hour later, we were supposed to have physics. But the Ong Li Pei didn't come and there was no substitute teacher. So for the next one hour and ten minutes, my class was in a totaly havoc. I was sleeping through all of this. After physics, went for mother tongue. Fell asleep till the bell rang to go home. Went to the library to return my overdue book but the stupid woman told me that i had to pay the fine. WTF man. I don't have the money! So i guess i won't get back my report book. Oh well, there's always next year. Was supposed to meet fann they all at the concourse but they just walked off without me. I managed to catch up with them but i was so pissed. Didn't say anything, just went home. I ate and ate and ate until i put on another 3kg but i don't care. It made me feel a little bit better.
I for got to watch LAGUNA BEACH!!!!! WTF man, my day just dosen't give me any breaks...~

SupremeShaun is sleek and Handsome @ 9:01 pm